How Discovering My True Identity Changed My Life

By YWAM Newcastle on May 10, 2017 in Staff Blog

Imagine a girl: quiet, shy, a worrywart who was afraid to try anything. Well, that was me growing up. I had my life all planned out by the time I was 14 years old and I was going to stick with it.

I wasn’t popular, but I really liked the academic side of school. I was picked on, and that’s when I decided to stay quiet. I wasn’t confident, so I just kept to myself and a few friends. I went through high school noticing I was good with numbers, just like my dad and brother, and I figured I would go on to be an accountant. Why not? I couldn’t see myself doing anything else. Once I was in high school, I was only focused on my education. I would stress over homework and grades, striving to be the top 10 in my class rank.

Fast forward to my last year in high school. My plan was falling into place perfectly. I was accepted to the only college I had applied to and had my degree all set up. Out of the blue, two of my friends invited me to their youth group one evening. I honestly don’t know what got into me, but I went with them and I’m so glad I did because that decision opened so many doors for me!

For the first time in my life, I saw who God really is and I wanted Him in my life.

As I experienced worship, and throughout the teaching that night, I began to glimpse God’s loving and accepting nature. My eyes were opened, and I felt like I could finally be myself. I am loud, outgoing, optimistic, and adventurous. I realised that up until that point, I had been believing a lie. I had thought that if I was quiet and hardworking, people would like me, and I would be happy with my life. God showed me that I could never be happy living life as someone other than my true self.

I began having dreams where I would be speaking in front of a huge crowd. The dreams were so real and overwhelming, that I tried to ignore them. But they kept coming back, and I realised they were from God, calling me toward what He created me to be.

I am His precious daughter and He has a much better plan for my life than anything I could come up with. He has revealed in me a passion for writing and storytelling. Since I began this adventure with God, He has taken me places I never dreamed I could go. Through these experiences, I have more stories to tell, and I hope to encourage others by telling my stories.

I am so grateful for this life God has given me. He has called me to be more than I ever imagined I could be. Without discovering my identity in God, I would have stayed as my old self. I could never truly be me without knowing who God says I am, and I’m so excited to dwell in His strength as I continue on this journey.

Rachel Pahnisch
School Of Communication & Digital Influence Student

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